Society has nearly forgotten what marriage is all about.

Today, emphasis is placed on extravagant weddings and “proving” commitment by getting married at young ages.

Marriage is not about these things, though. It is about the person you’re going to spend the rest of your life with. And theoretically, if one is so “in love” and destined to be with their significant other, why must they get married so young? What’s the rush?

Recently, I had a waitress who was surprisingly open about the topic of marriage. She confided her feeling that if she and her ex-husband had not gotten married at such the young age of 20, he would not have cheated on her and their marriage would still be intact.

She also explained that she felt pressured to get married, because they had been dating for four years.

This waitress isn’t the only person whose marriage has failed, though. According to Divorcerate.org, the approximate divorce rate in the U.S. is 50 percent. The site also states that the younger a couple gets married, the more likely they are to divorce.

Money also has a major impact on the likelihood that a marriage will end in divorce.

According to Health Guidance, an online database of health and lifestyle articles, “Money is the biggest reason for arguments in marriages and often leads up to divorce.”

Society encourages young people to disregard their lack of finances and spend money on an extravagant wedding anyway. And you know what these couples get to do after their wedding? Swim in a personally made pool of debt.

Like the unfortunate waitress, too many couples get wrapped up in trying to “prove” how meaningful their relationships are that they disregard their own youth and naivete. Do these people really even know each other?

Years later, they aren’t the same people that they were when they got married. Think about yourself a few years ago. What were your goals? What interested you? Who were your friends?

Today, the way you answer these questions will likely be quite different. When you’re young, a lot can change in only a few years’ time.

Rob Dobrenski, who holds a doctorate degree in clinical psychology, states in his article“Why marriages fail” that there is too much emphasis on “weddings” rather than “marriage.”

Dobrenski asks couples to imagine that they could be married without any of the extravagance of the event. He then challenges them to ask themselves, “Do you still want to be married to this person right now?”

In reality, nobody cares if a couple is married in their 20s rather than in their 30s, if they have a big wedding or a civil service. Sure a big wedding with an open bar is nice, but if divorce follows soon after, it is of no importance to your wedding guests.

Society gives the impression that marriage is the ultimate symbol of commitment, and young people are buying into it. Does getting married young make a couple feel secure about their relationship? Or is it merely an express ticket to a failed marriage?