“What is your stance on friends with benefits?”

The Gay Perspective

Friends generally have a lot in common, so things moving into the bedroom can happen. The question is do you let it happen again or just deem it a one-time thing.

We’ve all been there; not in a relationship and in need of emotional and physical contact. It is OK to get together with one of your friends temporarily and have every aspect of a relationship, except the relationship part.

Whether or not to have a friend with benefits is a decision only you can make. The moral judgement is on you and no one else.

However, having more than one friend with benefits is not OK. That’s really just you sleeping around.

Having a no-strings-attached relationship with a guy friend is the safest way to have sex when not in an actual relationship.

Gay clubs are filled with promiscuous people. There is no way of knowing where strangers have been. You are more likely to know the sexual history and HIV status of your friend.

The important thing to know is where to draw the line. The two of you just need to be on the same page and not expect anything out of it.

If one person has feelings and the other does not, it’s not fair to continue.

If you find yourself interested in another guy, it’s time to break off the benefits with your friend. If they’re in the same place you are emotionally, they will understand.

When you start dating someone, or even talking to someone, the guy you’ve been messing around with must immediately go back to being a friend. It can be difficult, but it is vital if you are to have any chance of a successful relationship with the new guy.

Sex with a good friend can be more fun than sex with someone you just met. You learn more about each other and you can become closer to them than you were before. It also gives you the ability to help your friend find “Mr. Right.” Since you know more about your friend, you know more about what and who they are really looking for.

Although you create the illusion of monogamy with a friend with benefits, it is not something to be discussed in a public forum. Others may see you as promiscuous, and potential boyfriends will see you as taken even though you aren’t.

Yes, it is OK to have a monogamous sex friend. However, would you want to date someone that is already bangin’ some guy? Probably not. So have fun with your friend, just keep that information to yourselves.