Before my ADHD diagnosis, life felt scattered with no end. Being told to focus and get things done was difficult, and it was one of many I struggled to explain to others, just how hard that is.

My normal was different from others’ “normal.” The feeling of being scattered was overwhelming but it’s how I navigated life; I thought things were just harder for me in a way it’s not for others.

Every day felt like it had no beginning and end; life was consistently on the go and I never felt a sense of accomplishment. The feeling of failure grew with me as I got older, it was as if I was just stuck at a level one when I knew I could do so much more.

As an adult, being diagnosed with ADHD (attention-deficit/hyper-activity disorder) has helped me understand why my brain operates the way it does. It took me about a year and a half to get the answer I needed since the healthcare system still lacks mental health understanding.

Like others, my biggest obstacle growing up was the lack of medical resources, which has mostly stayed the same as an adult.

Oct. 12 marked one year since the U.S. Food and Drug Administration stated a shortage of ADHD medicine. It was now causing millions to face refill delays and a lack of pharmacy stock.

For the past year, the shortage of medication has affected my daily life. It has only grown harder as the months have passed to obtain medication.

Having Kaiser Permanente as my medical insurance has been hard. Frustration has built up, I have been on and off my medication and I can’t express the impact it has had on me.

Not having access to medical resources has thrown me off track. Work and school are important to me, but have become increasingly harder to do. Daily life has been a rollercoaster of emotions and actions.

The feeling of being thrown off routine is one I dread. I feel successful then the next week I no longer feel as if accomplishing simple tasks is possible, and this will just get worse if the shortage doesn’t come to an end soon.