Music: the quiet driving force that people rely on to get them through their day. Radio, car commercials, Hot Topic, and Urban Outfitters are constantly trying to tell us what’s “cool.” The music industry is now a combination of chaotic sounds and a flow of money. There are tons of artists and bands that are just flat out awful. Some, unfortunately, have exceeded their shelf life.
This leads me right into a few cases: Millionaires, Jeffree Star, and Brokencyde. Three acts that come off rather gimmicky, lack any real writing skills, and are actually quite repetitive. The way they carry themselves comes across louder than their potential to actually make a song. They have, however, excelled in promoting themselves via Myspace. This is done not through music, but through Hello Kitty layouts with diamonds, dollar bill signs, and flashing colors that could cause epileptic seizures.
Moving “forward”, there are bands like The Devil Wears Prada, Dance Gavin Dance, Pierce The Veil, and Vanna. Four bands that throw around the word “hardcore” (the style popularize by Black Flag and Minor Threat) and “metal” (Slayer and Pantera) like it actually means something to them. They are about as safe as The Partridge Family. Even the Beach Boys had some rebellion to them!
Acts like Lady Gaga and Leona Lewis are as cross-eyed and clueless as an Olsen twin. The Pussycat Dolls have less enthusiasm and charisma than the girls in the Fanta commercials. It really must be a slow year when Katy Perry’s “I Kissed A Girl” (an obvious knock off of Jill Sobule’s 1995 hit “I Kissed A Girl”)
Another example is Fall Out Boy; one of the worst, whiniest, most annoying bands that music has seen in nearly a decade. If the name is not familiar to anyone, their brightly colored logos can be found on white t-shirts being worn by men who also sport pants that they appear to have stolen from their sisters.
Another band that shows lack of talent in nearly every conceivable way is Dragonforce, a hair metal band that’s been around for a while but only recently gained excessive popularity thanks to Guitar Hero III. At some point in their lives, the members of Dragonforce unanimously decided that it was pointless to invest in things like talent and a bassist, and focus more on lights, leather pants and “cool” stage effects. Dragonforce does however deserve major props for pulling of an amazing career move that few bands have ever succeeded in. They have managed to record and sell four studio albums, headline tours, and establish a massive fan base all by writing only one song.
Next to be addressed is the new phenomenon called Hollywood Undead. For those who are blessed enough to have never heard the music, they can be found all over MySpace, as so many terrible bands on the rise can. Hollywood Undead are six young men with masks (and without talent) who try to rap. The men claim to have a new unique style and message to bring to hip-hop but anyone who is brave enough to listen to the noise for one minute can tell that they have nothing musically revolutionary to offer. Hilariously enough, the sticker on their album reads: “41 million online HU fans can’t be wrong”. They are.
No one can deny that there is an army of rappers on the radio and in the music stores that have managed to release hit singles and make millions of dollars by rapping about the exact same thing: nothing. Among the ranks are Mims, Lil Jon, Lil’ Bow Wow, and everyone’s favorite Soulja Boy. It’s a sad world for respectable rappers with talent and a message when the new generations of rap fans only care about what sounds good as a ring tone.
Also doing disgustingly well is every little TV-addicted girl’s favorite Hannah Montana. Daughter of has-been Billy Ray Cyrus, Miley Cyrus is well on her way to global domination. She has done albums, concerts, television shows, movies, and has an entire aisle dedicated to pink stuff with her name and picture at Toys-R-Us. The Hannah Montana Empire has everything it needs; which obviously doesn’t include a singer with talent.
As we continue to give credit to bad artists, they will still be laughing all the way to the bank. The lack of substance and creativity in today’s popular music leaves it with the likes of bad radio jingles that are doomed to be forgotten.
